Handling money in a marriage is important for the family’s stability. But when this balance is upset, big problems can happen. This is the story of a woman who discovered her husband was spending their savings without her approval, risking their financial security.
“My husband and I have been together for over nine years, and I never thought about keeping our finances separate until last year. I’ve always been the saver, and he’s the spender. At first, it didn’t bother me because we had two incomes. We weren’t rich, but we lived comfortably.
A few years ago, my husband had a serious car accident and can’t work now, so I became the only one earning money. He now gets a disability pension, but it took four years to get it. During that time, we used up all our savings, almost lost everything, and our debts grew.”
“When he finally got his payment, I only asked him to pay his car loan and save part of it. He did neither. Instead, he spent all the money, and I couldn’t pay off any of our debts.
Lately, I have been able to save some money from my salary, but not much, and I plan to pay off some debts once I have enough saved. He knew I was saving for that.”
“About a month ago, I noticed that more than $700 was missing from our savings, and I asked him what happened. He told me he had lent it to his parents. I asked when they would pay it back because I needed that money, but he wasn’t sure.
I got really angry. He never asked me, and we hadn’t talked about it. He did it behind my back because he knew I would say no. We had a big fight, and I thought he would stop doing things behind my back, but he didn’t.”
“Yesterday I checked my account and another $1,000 was gone. Where did it go? He gave it to his parents again. So, I told him that from now on, I would only pay the house bills and buy our food.
If he wants to give them his money, that’s fine, but I’m not going to work 60 hours a week so he can keep giving away our money. I plan to go to the bank, take all the money from my account, and open a new one that he can’t access. Am I taking things too far?”